Hi friends,
I always believed that living is not a peaceful thing. Even on the days when nothing eventful happens, the amount of stressful information I intake keeps increasing. When I was younger, I had a hopeful “It’s gonna get so much better” feeling. I didn't know much about the world and what was going to happen, but I believed I could take part in the solution of some of its problems. I still think I can make positive contributions, but I get a lot more anxious about how. My mom says, it's certain that being older means you have more negative experiences.
My friend gave me advice that I hold close when I'm overwhelmed. “It's fine to cut back on the things you are looped in about. Or make them smaller,” We have these other ongoings in our lives, like learning a new language and other things you are doing positives that are more than just routines, they are also tools for your sanity. Doing things you love but not always with the goal of mastery but just doing them because they are positive and make you happy. Social media, news, could be things that make me feel that sanity if I had more discipline over what I was looking at. But I'm not good at looking away at the right moment, and I haven't been successful in spreading awareness and productivity in big numbers. I only know that in times of distress I want comfort from something warm that makes me feel loved. Just taking less actions but still receiving the good things in life. Maybe that’s what rest really is, I thought. Rest is practice for receiving love. And if I know how to receive love better, I'll be able to give love better, too. So that's what I will share today. The small routines and "tools" within my day that help me find that.
A lemon tea
Somebody at work once got me this starbucks drink and it got me drinking a version of this at home every day. Now, it marks the start of my morning. The version I make at home uses fresh lemons, honey, peppermint tea bag, some mild black tea, and at least 500ml of hot water. I pour it all into a hario coffee server and portion it out over 20 minutes. The combination of citrus & mint helps me with focus and digestion in a mild way. Well, it's mild to me, but my partner's face puckers up at the amount of lemon I use. So on the days she stays over I use about a third of the lemon, and on the days I miss her I get to enjoy the strength of lemon.
A healing video
When I'm sipping tea, sometimes I'll look outside the window, but many other times I'll put on a youtube video. My favourites are the sweet lifestyle ones that don't have any voiceovers or people talking at you, just music playing over subtitles. I've been watching haegreendal and katie recently, and I like their videos because even though I didn't watch with the intention of anything other than relaxing, I still got to learn some tips on recipes and about repairing clothes. It unconsciously sets the mood for me to start preparing lunch or lint-brush a coat. (I've heard about body doubling as a tool for people with impaired executive functioning, a topic which I'll get into another day). In that effect, I want to discover a soothing lifestyle video that has a lot of exercising, stretching, or muscle training, instead of experts that instruct me on what to do. Anyone know of any? :) I pretty much only watch 1 or 2 youtube videos during my morning tea time, so I have a youtube distraction blocker app installed called unhook app that clears away recs, comments, and leaves your homepage looking completely blank.
Waking up early
I don't wake up early to be on time (which I unfortunately really struggle with), it's more like waking up early is a happiness in itself. I love the moment the sky changes from dark the light. I love zoning out, brain still foggy. I love watching my cat groom himself to sleep after an unhurried breakfast. In any case, waking up early is a must for me even on days I don't work.
These three things are relatively within my control that I can look forward to. Some were things I used to hate, (like waking up early) became something I can now do with confidence. In the same way, I was able to cultivate friendships that feel a lot more steady, and it took a surprising amount of conflict and effort to get there. I also had things that I loved that stopped working for me, and I left them in the past. Your lifestyle will change, and your relationships don't have to be perfect. You don't always have to say the right things. Even the reconciliation between people doesn't have to be smooth, and it rarely is. On the days with feelings that feel so big and awkward, that fall just outside of my ability to process, I just stay focused on what I'm sure I can do.
And I'm happy to do them every day.
❤️chu
11,22 is the embarkment of a new outlet of expression. Do you have a favourite routine or drink? What are your little discoveries or daily moments of calm? Please share your tips with me!
the small routines within my day
Before I leave for work, I like to draw a cartoon for my husband, one to bring a smile when he wakes in the morning. Thank you for sharing your routine.